🔥 Levels of Lust (Kāma) — From Gross to Subtle
From a bhakti-yoga perspective
Lust vs Love: Why I'm Committed to the Fight
I'm gonna be straight with you—lust has messed with me more than I care to admit. And I don’t just mean actions. I’m talking about the subtle, sneaky ways it creeps into the mind, the eyes, the ego. Lust is the antithesis of love. It’s taking, not giving. It’s consumption, not connection.
I’ve come to believe that the pinnacle of manhood is to be loving—to live from the heart, not the hormones. That’s why my logo is a love heart with limbs. I’m inspired by the possibility of becoming a man who moves through this world with love as his driving force—not desire, not conquest, not ego. Just love.
This post is me putting a stake in the ground. It's for me. If you get something from it too, thats great. Below, I’ve laid out the levels of lust—from the obvious to the invisible—so I can see them, call them out, and go beyond them.
Because I don’t want to be ruled by lust.
I want to be ruled by love.
Let’s go there.
1. Gross Lustful Acts
Sexual activity outside dharma (adultery, illicit sex, porn, masturbation, etc.)
Kṛṣṇa says in the Gītā:
"Kāma eṣa krodha eṣa rajo-guṇa-samudbhavaḥ..."
“It is lust only, Arjuna, which is born of contact with the mode of passion and later transformed into wrath.”
(BG 3.37)
2. Mental Adultery
Dwelling mentally on lustful fantasies.
Lord Śrī Kṛṣṇa condemns it implicitly by emphasizing purity of thought as essential to spiritual progress.
Śrī Caitanya Mahāprabhu, quoting the śāstra, notes that even thinking of sex with another’s wife is adultery in the mind:
"Thinking of another's wife is as sinful as actual illicit sex."
(CC Madhya 8.255)
3. Glancing with Lust
A fleeting or prolonged lustful look.
Bhagavatam gives the example of Ajāmila, who fell from a single lustful glance.
4. Suggestive Speech or Flirtation
Using words to evoke sensuality, even subtly.
Śāstra warns against kāmya-vāk (speech laced with desire).
5. Desire to Enjoy Subtly
A sense of enjoyment in the mind — “I want to enjoy that person.”
No overt fantasy, but a selfish orientation toward others.
6. Desire to Be Enjoyed
Enjoying being attractive, desirable, admired.
The Gītā speaks of the desire for honor, recognition, prestige as deeply binding and tied to ahaṅkāra and rāga.
🧠 Subtlest Forms of Lust
7. Identification with the Body
The root of lust is the false ego: "I am this body."
Śrīla Prabhupāda writes:
"As soon as we accept the body as self, lust follows."
(BG 3.39 Purport)
8. Subtle Attachments and Longings
Nostalgia for sensual experiences.
Secret affection for enjoyment, even if renounced externally.
Śrīla Bhaktisiddhānta Sarasvatī says such subtle attachments are even more dangerous because they're hidden.
9. Minute Pleasure in Sex Talk or Sex Objectification
Laughing at sexual jokes, enjoying films, images, etc.
Even passive enjoyment can contaminate the consciousness.
🕉️ The Bhakta’s Response: Standing Like the Ocean
“āpūryamāṇam acala-pratiṣṭhaṁ samudram āpaḥ praviśanti yadvat
tadvat kāmā yaṁ praviśanti sarve
sa śāntim āpnoti na kāma-kāmī”
— Bhagavad-gītā 2.70
Translation:
“A person who is not disturbed by the incessant flow of desires—that enter like rivers into the ocean, which is ever being filled but is always still—can alone achieve peace, and not the man who strives to satisfy such desires.”
The devotee does not suppress lust like a stoic but transforms it by absorption in Kṛṣṇa. When desire comes, they don’t react — they let it pass, like a river entering the ocean.
🧘♂️ Yamunācārya’s Realization
"Since I have been engaged in the transcendental loving service of Kṛṣṇa, realizing ever-new pleasure in Him, whenever I think of sex with a woman, my face turns from it, and I spit at the thought."
— Caitanya-caritāmṛta, Madhya 22.87
This is the pinnacle. Not repression, but disgust toward base pleasures due to higher taste (paraṁ dṛṣṭvā nivartate, BG 2.59).
🧱 Levels of Lust — From Gross to Subtle and Their Remedies
1. Gross Sex Life Outside Dharma
Description: Illicit sex, porn, masturbation, etc.
Remedy: Follow the four regulative principles. Replace sense gratification with devotional service.
2. Mental Adultery
Description: Fantasizing about others in the mind.
Remedy: Chant attentively. Purify the heart through sādhana and surrender.
3. Lustful Glancing
Description: Even a glance can degrade the consciousness.
Remedy: Practice seeing all living beings as spirit souls, not objects for enjoyment.
4. Flirtation or Suggestive Speech (Kāmya-vāk)
Description: Speech charged with lustful or seductive undertones.
Remedy: Cultivate clean, humble, respectful communication.
5. Desire to Enjoy Others
Description: Wanting to extract pleasure from another without overt action.
Remedy: Shift your mindset from consumer to servant. Cultivate empathy and detachment.
6. Desire to Be Admired or Desired
Description: Subtle ego boost from being seen as attractive or desirable.
Remedy: Practice humility. Offer your body and beauty to Kṛṣṇa.
7. Bodily Identification
Description: The root cause — “I am this body.”
Remedy: Regularly hear śāstra. Meditate on being an eternal servant of Kṛṣṇa.
8. Subtle Longing for Past Pleasures
Description: Lingering taste or memory for enjoyment.
Remedy: Replace nostalgia with gratitude for spiritual progress and a higher taste.
9. Enjoyment of Sex-Related Topics
Description: Sexual jokes, media, memes, or indirect sensual content.
Remedy: Avoid entirely. Fill your mind with Hari-kathā and the Holy Name.
Haribol